The 9-to-5 that never ends: Why you need to set boundaries at work

Tahmina Alam, an undergraduate student at a private university, works part-time as a marketing executive at a reputed agency in Dhaka. She used to pride herself on being the "go-to" person on her team. 

"I was always the one who stayed back, took on extra work, answered calls on weekends," she said.

"But I started noticing how tired I was all the time. I couldn't enjoy meals. I would even feel irritated during family conversations. That's when I realised I hadn't drawn any line between my work and my life," she continues. 

Unfortunately, the pressure to work beyond regular hours is not just a personal struggle, it's also a societal issue.

Dr Farhana Sharmin, a psychologist who regularly counsels young professionals, said that many of her clients come in feeling "trapped" between wanting to succeed and wanting peace. "We need a shift in how we define dedication," she said. "Being available 24/7 isn't dedication, it's unsustainable."

In a country where staying late at the office often gets you a pat on the back and where replying to work texts after working hours is considered normal, the idea of setting boundaries at work still feels unfamiliar.

This culture of overcommitment may be a norm, but its impact is far from harmless. The pressure to keep performing has quietly led to a crisis of burnout, especially among young people. The guilt, the fear of falling behind, and the anxiety of being labelled as "unprofessional" or "uncooperative" often outweighs the need for rest.

According to a study carried out by the International Labour Organization (ILO), the mean weekly working hours in Bangladesh amount to 48.8, exceeding the worldwide average of 42.9 hours. According to a Bangladesh Institute of Development Studies (BIDS) report, over 50% of private sector workers in Dhaka work over 48 hours per week, and nearly 30% work over 60 hours.

Over 70% of those who participated said their workload was heavy or very heavy. Nearly 60% of respondents also claimed a lack of work autonomy. WHO and ILO jointly estimated in 2021 that the percentage of people working excessively has been rising since 2000.

This stress extends into the education sector as well. A Dhaka-based teacher, Samia (pseudonym), working at a reputed private school shares, "One of the hardest things for me has been avoiding emotional attachment with students who come from tough backgrounds. They often reach out outside school hours, and it's hard to turn them away. But being that emotionally available all the time takes a toll."

For teachers, boundaries are not just about time, but also about emotional energy. As per the research paper titled "Work-Life Balance: A Study on Female Teachers of Private Education Institutions of Bangladesh," 77.5% of female teachers in private educational institutions were dissatisfied with their working hours, and 62.5% felt overloaded with work. Additionally, 75% cited a lack of supervisory support as a significant challenge.

Teachers are expected to be both educators and emotional anchors, and they often personally find it challenging to draw a line when students need them most. Samia shares, "I try to be a good listener instead of taking on every problem. If I feel the emotional burden growing too heavy, I gently draw the line, for my own well-being."

She admitted that saying no is difficult, often accompanied by guilt. At times, she takes on tasks beyond her responsibilities simply because she feels bad turning them down. However, this constant overextension has started to take a toll on her mental health. These days, she tries to manage expectations more consciously by calmly communicating her limitations and drawing the line when needed.

Despite personal strategies for boundary-setting, institutional support often falls short. "In my school, there hasn't been any formal training or guidance on setting boundaries," she added. "Even though management understands our limitations, there's always this silent pressure to do more."

Dr Farhana Sharmin, a psychologist who regularly counsels young professionals, said that many of her clients come in feeling "trapped" between wanting to succeed and wanting peace. "We need a shift in how we define dedication," she said. "Being available 24/7 isn't dedication, it's unsustainable."

While some companies are beginning to set clearer expectations, the shift is slow. SELISE, for example, has made it a point to communicate work hours and boundaries during the onboarding process.

"We make it clear during onboarding," shared one employee, Fatima (pseudonym), working as an HR at SELISE. "To count as a full working day, employees must work a minimum of 9 hours, including lunch. You can start anytime before noon, but if you log in after 12 pm, it's counted as a half day."

While the company does not offer overtime pay, it provides an alternative. Employees who work on weekends or public holidays can apply for time off in lieu (TOIL), allowing them to take a day off later without using their annual leave.

However, SELISE's approach doesn't mean that all employees have the luxury of leaving their work behind at the end of the day. Certain roles, particularly in tech support and stakeholder-facing positions, still require availability outside of working hours. These expectations are discussed upfront.

The challenge of setting boundaries is ongoing, and it's not just a one-time decision; it requires constant practice and communication.

Fatima suggests small but effective strategies like informing colleagues about availability, using shared calendars, and being transparent about workload. Phrases such as "Let me check and get back to you" or "Can we revisit this later?" can help delay commitments and reduce the pressure to say yes immediately.

It's also crucial to normalise self-care in a society that too often equates rest with laziness. Whether it's taking a walk, scheduling regular breaks, or spending time with loved ones, these moments of rest are vital.

Tahmina shared her own boundary-setting journey, "I just stopped answering work messages after 9 PM. At first, people were annoyed. But now they know not to expect replies from me late at night. I'm still reliable, I just don't run myself into the ground anymore."

It's high time we realise that setting boundaries is necessary. At the end of the day, it isn't about working less or caring less, rather it's about making space for life outside work for maintaining mental health and preventing burnout