In my loving memory: Eid Mubarak, Abba!

Eid, a festival of vibrant colours and cherished moments, now arrives with a silent ache in my heart. 

It's been three years since Abba left us, yet his presence lingers amid whispers of untold stories and unfulfilled dreams fill the void in our hearts. 

Abba, our strength and source of endless love, guarded our home with quiet resolve. His laughter and anger - a melody that lit up our days, now feels distant.

Every Eid, memories flood back, reminding me of the stories I'll only share with him when I'm talking to myself. 

And on the morning of each passing Eid, as the sun paints the blue sky in golden hues, I join the prayer and then walk over to Abba's resting place.

The graveyard, once a place of sadness, now offers solace. 

Amidst the gentle embrace of nature, I feel Abba's love surround me. Standing by his grave, memories rush over me, each one carrying the weight of missed conversations, emotions, and shared dreams.

But alongside the memories of nostalgia, there's a deep sadness.

I wished to be my father's pillar, his strength. It's a grace and gift to be there for our parents in their old age. They become like our children.

I wish I, too, could have continued helping him walk with strength as he had once taught me how to walk and talk. I look at his walking stick and feel overwhelmed sometimes. 

A walking stick of my father. Photo: Nayem Ali

As I offer prayers for his eternal peace, I'm overwhelmed with a sense of longing – longing for one more chance to tell him how much I miss him, how much he meant to me, one more chance to share my dreams with him and one more chance to feel his warm hands and hugs. 

On this Eid, as I stood before his grave, I offered a prayer of gratitude for the gift of his love and guidance. 

Though he may no longer walk beside me, his spirit lives on in the memories I cherish and the dreams I hold close to my heart. 

And as I bid farewell, I carry within me the certainty that although our words linger unspoken and our dreams remain unseen, his love will forever dwell in the depths of my soul, a guiding light amid the shadows of grief.

Eid Mubarak, Abba…