If moms could write the rules, how would they redesign Mother's Day?

While the tradition dates back to the early 20th century and continues well into the 21st, the way we celebrate Mother's Day has often reflected our choices rather than what moms truly want. HT Lifestyle spoke to real moms to understand how they feel about Mother's Day and how they would rewrite the rules if given the chance. Here's what they had to say.

What's one thing you would completely remove from Mother's Day?

Gayatri Kannake, a homemaker, wrote, "I would remove the pressure of grand gestures and material gifts. The day should be about genuine connection, not perfection."

Another mother, Devyani Jaipuria, vice chairperson of Cocoon Hospitals, said, "The idea that the value of motherhood can be meaningfully expressed within a single day. Motherhood is continuous and often quiet, much of it unfolding in moments that are neither visible nor acknowledged, whether it is remembering the small details that matter to your child, or simply being emotionally present even on days when you are exhausted."

"In that sense, Mother's Day should serve as a reminder of something that exists every day, rather than the only moment we pause to recognise it," she added.

Alka Srivastava, a mathematics educator and mother of two, said, "I've never been fond of Mother's Day—I believe mothers deserve to be celebrated every day."

What would your ideal Mother's Day look like—no filters?

Gayatri mentioned that spending quality time with her kids who live far away, and cooking their favourite meals for them, is her perfect day.

Devyani stated that, for her, it would be a day spent with her children, who have given her the experience of motherhood, and with her mother, whose influence continues to shape her. There is something meaningful in that continuity across generations, sitting together over a meal, sharing stories, or even something as simple as watching a film together without distractions. She highlighted that she wouldn't associate the day with elaborate plans, just the space to be present with one another. Often, it is in these unstructured moments that the relationship feels most real.

Do you feel genuinely celebrated or just acknowledged?

Gayatri said, "I feel this is the one day my efforts are truly acknowledged. Taking care of my family is part of my everyday life, and while I know I am loved, this day makes that appreciation more visible, and that means a lot to me."

"There is warmth in how motherhood is recognised, but the deeper sense of being seen comes from everyday moments. Much of motherhood exists in spaces that are not always articulated, and it is in those quieter recognitions that it feels most meaningful," Devyani told HT Lifestyle.

What's something your family thinks you want, but you actually don't?

Gayatri said, "My family thinks I need shopping or gifts when I'm upset, but honestly, all I want is for them to listen to me."

For Devyani, intent matters. She said, "I value authenticity over structure. A day that unfolds naturally often feels far more meaningful than one that is carefully designed."

Alka Srivastava shared that she isn't fond of grand gestures or gifts; instead, she finds greater joy in seeing her children grow into good human beings and do well in life.

If Mother's Day came with rules, what would rule #1 be?

"I know this might sound impractical, but my one rule would be simple: my kids should take the day off from work and be with me. No distractions, just quality time together," Gayatri Kannake told HT Lifestyle.

Devyani said, "To know your mother well enough through the year that you do not have to ask her what she would like on that day. Mothers spend much of their time understanding and anticipating the needs of others. What becomes truly meaningful is when that same understanding is returned."