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WEDNESDAY, JULY 23, 2025
Revenge of the computer

Splash

Ummay Marzan Jui
11 February, 2020, 11:55 am
Last modified: 11 February, 2020, 12:02 pm

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Revenge of the computer

Do you know that you have just rang the bell of war?

Ummay Marzan Jui
11 February, 2020, 11:55 am
Last modified: 11 February, 2020, 12:02 pm
Artwork: Asifur Rahman
Artwork: Asifur Rahman

What is the first thing you do when your boss loses temper and yells at you? You come back to your desk, have a seat, pretend as if you are typing and a few moments later, you ram the enter button so hard that it feels like a small earthquake.

Your colleagues get to know that something has happened with you. They understand and justify your action as they do the same at times. However, do you know that you have just rang the bell of war?

Do you think your computer does not feel anything as it calculates only in binary? Does it not feel the urge of taking revenge?

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It can take revenge in the worst ways possible and you are so dumb that you would never get that. You are going to think that it is a 'technical problem.' However, it is your karma that has ruined everything several times.

Are you contemplating when exactly it does so? Start pondering in silence. You might find some hints and here are some clues for you as well.

It takes revenge when you are in a rush and want to finish work as soon as possible. It sniffs your fear and silently starts plotting against you. It ignores your command and does not save a single letter and print what you have commanded.

Maybe it opens application that have not been clicked for decades without asking you. Photoshop, Microsoft Excel and PowerPoint will open and shut down at the same time when you are only using Microsoft Word. It is just the siren.

Take hint from here and do not touch anything. Do not even breathe. Just act like you are dead.

Pressing (ctrl+s) after every five seconds might be a breathing technique, maybe you have also turned on the auto save option. But wait, does that save you? Absolutely not.

When there is a power outage, the computer hangs or shuts down, do you think your file is going to work? Hissing, whispering, begging, threatening or cursing cannot save you from the disaster, on that very moment.

If it cannot hang your computer, it is going to crash. You know that everything is fair in love and war. So, you are doomed. It is like, you are on a shore welcoming a cyclone with broad shoulders.

So, just assure that when your boss is yelling, you are not going to batter your hidden anger on computer. Wait a second. Are you planning to rebuke any of your juniors as a second option?

It is going to be the worst idea as they can make your life hell in the foulest way that you might have even imagined. Rather, go and watch some videos about anger management on YouTube.

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